Days are getting shorter. As we race toward winter, it can feel like we have less time, especially for the things we want to do outside of work. For me, those things are travel, photography and spending time in nature. For others, they could be gardening, long walks with a podcast or outdoor coffee chats with friends — whatever “fills your cup.”
These activities motivate us, provide a moment of peace and make us feel whole. But when we don’t have enough time, sunlight or control over our schedule to squeeze in these pursuits, burnout sets in. We’ve all heard the reports about exhausted, demotivated employees. With this issue in the spotlight and mindfulness now mainstream, why are so many people still suffering?
My answer: loss of control. The predecessor to burnout is feeling like you don’t have command over your own life. Leaders with outdated expectations for their employees contribute to this feeling. Each new rule or surveillance tactic only adds fuel to the fire. If we let employees control their schedules, I think we’ll see a decline in burnout rates.
Earlier this year, I set the goal for a “meeting-free year.” I never intended to accomplish this goal — I just wanted to push myself and my team to show consideration for each other’s schedules. At the time I didn’t explicitly connect my resolution to burnout, but it’s certainly related. Combine a full-time job, fewer daylight hours and the many responsibilities that come with being human, and it’s clear that filling your cup requires intention.
Of course, intention alone isn’t the answer. People need supportive leaders and culture behind them to ensure their work life meshes with their personal life, as opposed to remaining in two, “Severance”-style realms.
In fact, I’ve been using my public calendar to manage every element of my day for years. To me, openness around your daily schedule is natural and ensures no one books over sacred time. But even though remote work gave us the flexibility to build our days in the most functional way, many conceal their patchwork schedules, maintaining the appearance of a 9–5 workday even if they’re dropping off their kids, hitting the grocery store or spending time outside before dusk.
So, the goal isn’t a blank calendar. The goal is a schedule you control that reflects how you work best. Here’s how I think managers and employees can join forces to help people get there.
Make time to recharge, no matter when
I’m a long-time Tottenham Hotspur soccer fan. It’s fun to follow, and I like feeling connected to something bigger than myself. Even when they lose, which happens more than I’d like. Since they’re part of the English Premier League, their games are usually in the middle of the day here in North Carolina. I may not control when they play, but I do control my ability to watch them play. Whenever there’s a game, I put it on my calendar. And except for emergencies, my team lets me watch in peace.
Some might dismiss this as a perk of being CEO, but I encourage all my employees to do the same thing. I want them to keep their cups filled, too, whatever that looks like. I’m a better boss because I keep in touch with my other passions. I’m more empathetic, relaxed, and have more headspace for the work I’m doing. I want the same for my employees.
For leaders worried about productivity, let’s be real, your team may still watch the game while trying to do their work. People need time during the day to recharge. If your expectations make employees feel guilty for taking that time then they’ll be less engaged, and the work will suffer. The enemy of productivity isn’t distraction, it’s shame, so let’s get rid of it where we can.
Make your calendar public, and don’t apologize for it
You will never hear me say, “Sorry I can’t make that, there’s a Spurs game,” or “I’m so sorry but my kid’s recital conflicts, so I have to miss.” I understand why people do this. They’ve been made to feel like work needs to be the top priority. If they tend to their lives during “work hours” they feel like they have to make amends. That’s silly. We all have lives outside of work and whether our bosses like it or not, we are living them. We shouldn’t have to apologize for that.
We all have to run errands, take care of loved ones or just see the sunshine. There’s no need to act like we aren’t doing personal things. It’s not an issue to step out during work — it’s human. Frankly, it’s a waste of energy for us to worry about pretending otherwise. It isn’t realistic to ask anyone to spend 40 hours a week, in 8-hour chunks, just staring at a screen. I honestly don’t know how we did this (or pretended to) for so long, and I don’t know a single person who still does.
Life doesn’t begin at 5 p.m. — especially when it’s already dark by then. I trust my people to decide how they make the most of their day. If grocery shopping at noon to avoid the rush saves time and energy, then I want them to feel free to block their calendar with “Groceries” at noon.
There’s a misconception that if we break focus we’re wasting time or procrastinating. But it’s well documented that our minds actively work through problems in the background. This is why we sometimes get our best ideas or figure out our hardest problems in the shower. Filling your cup isn’t avoiding work, it’s enhancing your productivity. So, take the leap. Put those healthy, enriching things on your public calendar. Your time block might just encourage a coworker to do the same. Not only does this create a more honest, authentic workplace, but it enables everyone else to support your effort.
Remember that everyone fills their cup differently
There is no universal prescription to avoid burnout. It doesn’t matter exactly what you do, just do something. For instance, my wife loves reading on our porch. It’s not really about the book she’s reading, or that our porch is some special sanctuary. It’s about taking time for herself undefined by anything else. Time she gets to control.
As managers, we need to accept everyone’s version of reading on the porch. Most feel fine taking time off to care for a sick kid, or for family vacation, but these aren’t the only breaks that matter. Everyone has things to do. If we trust and celebrate our colleagues before questioning them, they’ll show up ready to contribute to great work and a healthy culture.
As the holidays approach, this is especially important to remember. We will all have commitments to family and friends, or events beyond our control. We should be able to determine how to use our time around those commitments. If you need to put a pie in the oven at 3 p.m., which pushes a deliverable to an odd hour — but it’s still on time — I just care that your pie turned out OK.
Maybe you haven’t found ways to fill your cup yet. I encourage you to try things out and check in with yourself. Does this make me feel rested? Do I feel like myself? Am I doing this just for me, not to meet expectations? If the answer to any of those questions is “No,” then it’ll just drain whatever energy you have. But there’s no timeline — it’s never too late to find a new practice that recharges your spirit.
A burned-out team is not an effective team
You probably already have something that brings you joy that you don’t set aside time for. You might also feel burned out. Try setting aside time for whatever your thing is, and stick to it. The task here isn’t to make your hobbies a burden but to set boundaries that keep you healthy and sane. Work will always be there when you’re done.
As managers, it’s on us to help our people identify burnout. Regardless of what shows up on our calendars, everyone is already making the most of flexible work. It’s time we band together to be transparent and remove the guilt.
Employees, this is where having a public calendar can help you! Is a colleague’s schedule stuffed with meetings and busywork to the point they don’t have time for lunch? Do you know that they’re rushing from their computer to meet their kids’ needs? Check in with them to see if they’re finding moments to recharge. Their schedule may be full — but make sure their cup is full, too.